Monday, October 13, 2008

Running. Part I.

I went for a great run tonight.

Let's get lost tonight/You can be my black Kate Moss tonight/Play secretary I'm the boss tonight/And you don't give a f*** what they all say, right?/Awesome, the Christian in Christian Dior/Damn they don't make 'em like this anymore/I ask, cause I'm not sure/Do anybody make real s*** anymore?

I left the house around 9pm, dressed for the cold and armed with mace and the two little lights I keep on my bike. I had my driver's license in my pocket . . . just in case anything happened.

You may be watching from a safe distance/You may be so close you can taste the blood/You may have headed for higher ground/You may be drowning in the flood/No matter what you do/Love will find you

My plan, as it is most nights, was to run north on LeMay until I was tired of running, then turn around and run home. This is usually a good plan, as I run twice as far as I'd like. Since I run about half as often as I'd like, it all works out.

Speak to me, when all you got to keep is strong/Move along, move along like I know you do/And even when your hope is gone/Move along, move along just to make it through/Move along/Move along

Tonight was ethereal. For 1:06:32, it was me-and-the-pave-ment, step-af-ter-step-af-ter-step, pitch-black-and-no-cars-a-round-so-I-ran-down-the-cen-ter-of-the-street.

Just look to the rainbow you will see/The sun will shine 'till eternity/I've got so much love in my heart/No one can tear it apart/Feel the love generation/Feel the love generation

Running kicks my brain into overdrive. Tonight was no exception. Rounding the corner from Carpenter to LeMay, I was pining for the nights two years ago when I was training for my first marathon - those nights when I'd rather be sprinting down Overland or Taft Hill in the dark than having a beer at Road. Further down the street, I watched my long ponytail charge back and forth across my shadow and gave God thanks for the motivation and the ability to spend a Monday night this way. Coming up to the light at Paragon Point, I thought about the people I've spent the last four years with who now live so very far away - AS, KH, BB. I thought about Katie. I thought about MB and the conversations we had under the stars this summer. Then I looked at the stars for a little while; I was pleased, but not surprised, to spot a satellite instantly.

I think it turned ten o'clock but I don't really know/Then I can't remember caring for an hour or so/Started crying and I couldn't stop myself/I started running but there's no where to run to/I sat down on the street and took a look at myself/Said where you going man you know the world is headed for hell/Say your goodbyes if you've got someone you can say goodbye to

Of course I know it's risky to run alone in the dark. Frankly, that's part of why I do it. I crave the adrenaline rush of knowing I need to keep myself safe. And I crave the alone time.

And your eyes are the size of the moon/You could 'cause you can so you do/We're feeling so good/just the way that we do/When it's nine in the afternoon

When I crested the hill on LeMay just above St. Elizabeth's, I looked out at southern Fort Collins and saw no one else around - nothing but an open four-lane road and a couple hundred street lights.

Now hang me up to dry/You wrung me out/Too too too many times/Now hang me up to dry/I'm pearly like the whites/The whites of your eyes

Seven miles later, I have no cartilage in my knees . . . and I haven't felt so alive in a long time.

And when there's nowhere else to run/Is there room for one more son/These changes ain't changing me/The cold-hearted boy I used to be

*
The text in italics are the lyrics of the songs in my "Run Faster!" playlist.

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